Passé Composé with Reflexive and Reciprocal Verbs
Reflexive and reciprocal verbs are commonly used in French, and they appear frequently in the passé composé. All reflexive and reciprocal verbs form the passé composé with ÊTRE as their helping verb.
However, past participle agreement is not always as straightforward as it may seem.
The key is to determine whether the reflexive pronoun is a direct or indirect object. This determines whether the past participle agrees with the subject.
In this lesson, you’ll learn how to form the passé composé with reflexive and reciprocal verbs, when to make agreement, and how to recognize the situations in which there is no agreement.
You can download a PDF of this lesson guide in my private French Grammar Library.
1. Normal Reflexive Verbs in the Passé Composé
A reflexive verb describes an action that the subject performs on or for itself.
For example:
- Je me lave. – I wash myself.
- Tu te réveilles. – You wake up.
- Elle se prépare. – She gets ready.
In the passé composé, all reflexive verbs use ÊTRE as their helping verb. The reflexive pronoun comes before the helping verb, and the past participle generally agrees with the subject when the reflexive pronoun is a direct object.
Formation
SUBJECT + REFLEXIVE PRONOUN + ÊTRE + PAST PARTICIPLE
Here is the conjugation of se laver in the passé composé:
| Subject | French | English |
|---|---|---|
| Je | Je me suis lavé(e). | I washed myself. |
| Tu | Tu t’es lavé(e). | You washed yourself. |
| Il / Elle | Il s’est lavé. / Elle s’est lavée. | He / She washed himself / herself. |
| Nous | Nous nous sommes lavé(e)s. | We washed ourselves. |
| Vous | Vous vous êtes lavé(e)(s). | You washed yourself / yourselves. |
| Ils / Elles | Ils se sont lavés. / Elles se sont lavées. | They washed themselves. |
Remember that the past participle agrees with the subject in gender and number:
- Add -e for a feminine subject.
- Add -s for a plural subject.
- Add -es for a feminine plural subject.
Why Is There Agreement?
Consider this sentence:
Elle s’est lavée. – She washed herself.
The reflexive pronoun se represents the person being washed. It answers the question “Whom did she wash?” The answer is herself.
In this sentence, se is a direct object pronoun. Because it comes before the past participle, agreement is required.
This is the usual pattern with reflexive verbs when the reflexive pronoun is a direct object.
2. The Body Part Rule: No Agreement with the Reflexive Pronoun
One important exception to the usual agreement pattern occurs when a reflexive verb is followed by a body part.
Consider:
Elle s’est lavé les mains. – She washed her hands.
Why is lavé not feminine?
The reflexive pronoun se is indirect here. She washed her hands, not herself. The hands are the direct object of the verb, and they appear after the past participle.
Because the reflexive pronoun is indirect, there is no agreement with the subject.
Here are more examples:
- Elle s’est brossé les dents. – She brushed her teeth.
- Il s’est lavé le visage. – He washed his face.
- Elles se sont brossé les cheveux. – They brushed their hair.
- Nous nous sommes lavé les mains. – We washed our hands.
Remember this rule:
When a reflexive verb is followed by a body part, the reflexive pronoun is generally indirect, and the past participle does not agree with the subject.
What Happens When You Replace the Body Part with a Pronoun?
Now consider what happens when the direct object (the body part) is replaced by a direct object pronoun.
Elle s’est lavé les mains. – She washed her hands.
Elle se les est lavées. – She washed them.
In the second sentence, les replaces les mains. It is a direct object pronoun placed before the helping verb.
The past participle now agrees with the preceding direct object pronoun les, which represents the feminine plural noun les mains.
This is why we write lavées.
The reflexive pronoun se remains indirect, but the preceding direct object pronoun triggers agreement.
More examples:
- Elle s’est brossé les dents. → Elle se les est brossées.
- Ils se sont lavé les mains. → Ils se les sont lavées.
The rule has not changed. A past participle agrees with a preceding direct object. In these examples, the direct object pronoun comes before the past participle.
3. Reflexive and Reciprocal Verbs with Indirect Objects
Some reflexive and reciprocal verbs have an indirect object rather than a direct object.
With these verbs, the reflexive pronoun answers the questions À qui ? (To whom?) or Pour qui ? (For whom?).
There is no agreement with the subject when the reflexive pronoun is indirect.
This is true even though the helping verb is ÊTRE.
For example:
Ils se sont téléphoné. – They called each other.
The verb is téléphoner à quelqu’un (to telephone someone). The pronoun se means “to each other” and is an indirect object. Therefore, téléphoné does not agree with ils.
Here are some common examples:
| French | English | Verb construction |
|---|---|---|
| Les enfants se sont téléphoné. | The children called each other. | téléphoner à |
| Mes amis se sont écrit. | My friends wrote to each other. | écrire à |
| Nous nous sommes donné des cadeaux. | We gave each other gifts. | donner quelque chose à quelqu’un |
| Elles se sont offert des fleurs. | They gave each other flowers. | offrir quelque chose à quelqu’un |
| Tu t’es envoyé un message. | You sent yourself a message. | envoyer quelque chose à quelqu’un |
| Ils se sont prêté des livres. | They lent each other books. | prêter quelque chose à quelqu’un |
| Elles se sont répondu par e-mail. | They answered each other by email. | répondre à |
| Vous vous êtes acheté des souvenirs. | You bought each other souvenirs. | acheter quelque chose à quelqu’un |
| Elles se sont parlé hier. | They spoke to each other yesterday. | parler à |
| Nous nous sommes demandé des conseils. | We asked each other for advice. | demander quelque chose à quelqu’un |
Notice that none of the past participles in these examples agrees with the subject.
For example:
- Elles se sont parlé. (NOT parlées)
- Mes amies se sont écrit. (NOT écrites)
- Les filles se sont téléphoné. (NOT téléphonées)
The reflexive pronoun is indirect, so there is no agreement.
4. Reciprocal Verbs with Direct Objects
Reciprocal verbs describe actions that two or more people perform toward one another.
Some reciprocal verbs take direct objects. When the reciprocal pronoun is a direct object and comes before the past participle, agreement is required.
For example:
Elles se sont vues hier. – They saw each other yesterday.
The verb is voir quelqu’un. The pronoun se is a direct object because it answers the question “Whom did they see?”
Since se comes before the past participle, vues agrees with the feminine plural subject elles.
More examples:
- Ils se sont rencontrés au café. – They met each other at the café.
- Elles se sont regardées. – They looked at each other.
- Nous nous sommes aidés. – We helped each other.
- Elles se sont embrassées. – They kissed each other.
Compare these examples with the indirect-object verbs in the previous section:
- Elles se sont vues. – They saw each other. (voir quelqu’un: direct object)
- Elles se sont parlé. – They spoke to each other. (parler à quelqu’un: indirect object)
The difference in the verb construction determines whether agreement is required.
5. The Important Rule to Remember
All reflexive and reciprocal verbs use ÊTRE in the passé composé. However, you cannot automatically make the past participle agree with the subject every time.
First, determine whether the reflexive pronoun is a direct or indirect object.
| Situation | Agreement? | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Reflexive pronoun is a direct object | Yes, with the subject | Elle s’est lavée. |
| Reflexive verb followed by a body part | No agreement with the subject | Elle s’est lavé les mains. |
| Reflexive pronoun is an indirect object | No agreement | Elles se sont parlé. |
| Reciprocal pronoun is a direct object | Yes, with the subject | Elles se sont vues. |
| A direct object pronoun comes before the past participle | Yes, with that direct object | Elle se les est lavées. |
The most important thing to remember: ÊTRE is always the helping verb for reflexive and reciprocal verbs, but agreement depends on the direct object.
Continue Practicing French Reflexive Verbs
If you would like to review the basics, start with my lesson on common French reflexive verbs.
You can also review my French daily routine vocabulary to see how reflexive verbs are used in everyday conversations.
For more practice with past participle agreement, review my lesson on the passé composé with ÊTRE.
